In my last blog, I didn’t get to mental orgasms because there were more than enough paths to bring women to orgasm through just physical means. Now it’s time to discuss mental paths that can induce orgasm even without physical touch.
For most of Western history, the concept of mental orgasms was deemed to be strictly cis-male phenomena. Further studies, particularly recent breakthroughs in brain research, demonstrate that braingasms apply to all genders. More than that, for some of us, orgasms stirred by our brains rather than our bodies, may be a primary path for some individuals to have orgasms at all.
The range of mental stimuli I’ll list is gender-neutral. It can apply to females, males, non-binary people, and trans folk. It’s important to recognize that when it comes to human psychology, any one of us, regardless of gender, can rely on our internal mental realities to give us the extra boost that makes our juices flow.
Here is a short list (because we still have so much more to learn about the brain and its capacities) of known ways that people can achieve mental orgasms.
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Paths to Mental Orgasms
Fetish orgasms
For nearly 100 years, the scientific communities held fast to the idea that only cis-men were fetishists. Now we know for a fact that ALL genders can become so aroused by a fetish object (e.g., shoes, girdles, leather, diapers) or action (e.g., spanking, obedience, bondage, humiliation) that they may climax without direct stimulation to the genitals.
Fantasy Orgasms
You don’t need a fetish to have a creative mind. Fantasy orgasms are when your mind is so gripped by a fantasy — whether it’s obsessing over a crush or imagining yourself as the heroine of a romance novel — that you have small (or big!) orgasms over them.
Visual Orgasms
Visual receptivity to sexy things is NOT limited to men (as has often been claimed). It is a gender-neutral experience. Women have long known they can cream their panties, and even get an orgasmic shudder when they see someone(s) they find incredibly attractive.
Porngasms
Technically, a porngasm is when you masturbate to porn. But since visual orgasms exist, orgasms from watching porn also exist — no masturbation is required. The visual stimuli are key. Those include appealing participants, hot facial expressions, any toys or gear they use, the scenario and setting, and the dialogue and noises adult stars make. For some of us, the combination of all those sexy elements, and an imagination that relishes all the little details of what’s happening on their screen, is enough to climax.
Soundgasms
There is a wealth of anecdotal information from people who have had orgasms listening to particular songs and music. Others have reported being so affected by a tone of voice or the voice itself that they experience a shudder of orgasmic pleasure course through them. It has been linked to ASMR, though the theory remains scientifically unproven.
“Energetic” orgasms
Also described as “tantric breath orgasms,” this is when people go into a deep trance state that allows them to direct their energy and focus it on their erotic potential. Again, there is scant medical evidence on the phenomenon. On the other hand, there is abundant anecdotal evidence from people who have studied tantra and mastered the skill. They report that this kind of energy work is intense and can lead to enhancing orgasms, achieving full-body orgasms, and having no-touch orgasms through body-energy manipulation. Please note that Tantra is not a fast track to orgasm. It requires commitment and serious work to build up to a no-contact orgasm.
Dreamgasms
(Note: Others can’t manipulate dreamgasms. They are a spontaneous primal process.)
You likely know that many males have “wet dreams.” When they wake up, they find a trace or smell of wet semen as evidence. But females and other genders have them too because orgasms during dreams are just another aspect of having an active human brain! In different genders, the body may not leave any evidence behind. If you can remember the dream, you will recall that your dream state horniness seemed supernaturally powerful. It was! Your brain takes advantage of your sleep state to give you an uninhibited, primal type of orgasm.
Hypnotic Orgasms
Although scientific evidence remains lacking, a recent study suggests they are real and warrant more study. I asked my friend, Terance Schmidt, a certified hypnotist with 18 years of experience in erotic hypnosis for his thoughts.
Schmidt said, “Hypnosis can easily be used to produce sensations in the body or mind. So, why wouldn’t we use it for hot sex? Here’s a brief look at some things we can do with hypnosis:
- Create sensation in the body. You can have someone experience anything you can imagine and describe. Pleasure from being penetrated? Sure. Licked by a hundred tongues? Why not? Have a couple extra clits or new sex organs to play with? Of course. I once hypnotized a woman to feel pleasure in a dildo then had her masturbate it and feel like she was jerking off. For a mind bender, she then fucked herself with it and experienced it from both ends.”
- Play with mental arousal. It’s possible to cause a partner to remember the feelings from any previous sexual experience or fantasy, combine them with others, and ramp up those feelings till a person is writhing in ecstasy. This can as easily be done with the feelings from fetishes or any other things which excite a person.”
So How Do You Give a Woman an Orgasm?
Now you know the physical paths and many of the primary mental paths to female orgasm. Consider them a smorgasboard of arousal techniques. Perhaps you prefer the straightforward physical approach because you love to touch and penetrate a female body. Maybe you’re all about fun toys to explore her anatomical and orgasmic potentials. Or perhaps you want to appeal to her native demisexual potentials and play with her mind’s erotic impulses.
The KEY is not the existence of a myriad of physical and mental paths. The KEY is finding the specific thing(s) that make her excited. To locate those erotic centers of pleasure in a female body, try experimenting with different techniques (with her eager consent, of course — never assume she will like a sensation or psychological type of stimulation!) and see which one(s) arouse her beyond her wildest expectations. For some females, it could be as straightforward as fingering her clitoris. For others, it could be anal penetration that rocks their world. Or perhaps doing energy work or erotic hypnosis will take her to new peaks of orgasmic pleasure.
You have the knowledge now to expand your repertoire with her. Since I offered the facts, you can Google any of the techniques to do further research, or you can (safely, sanely, and ALWAYS consensually) start exploring her built-in mechanisms and find out which one(s) produce the results you both want. There is no replacement for testing out techniques — sex is experiential, meaning that we all learn another body’s trigger points by gently testing them in real life with a partner who wants to learn about her body’s responses.
Everyone is unique. Again, don’t expect all methods to work for any specific person. But if you explore the pathways outlined in this two-part piece, you will be on your way to giving her the best orgasms of her life.
photo credit: Geralt @ Pixabay.com
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